Little things...Big Rewards

Dear Savannah,

Today, you are three months shy of your third birthday. I am having a hard time with you turning three because of you transitioning into school at such a young age. You are still so baby like to me. You need more care than most three year olds. Selfishly, I have just enjoyed everyday with you and I don't want to give up my time as your mommy. I know it happens to every mother as they learn to let go, I am just so not mentally ready to do this and I am finding myself with a lot of anxiety right now.

Unfortunately, you have another cold. You are handling this one pretty well, although I worry about another ear infection because you spend many hours a day on your back. We prop you up but you are just too active to stay in the ideal situation to help with your congestion. I'm very happy that you are so active, especially because you are not mobile.

Things change for you went you are not feeling great. For example, feeding you can be a bit trickier. Tonight, you gagged on your bite size pears several times before I made a pear mash instead. I'm not sure if it is because you are congested or lack of coordination, however, safety first and so I mashed away. You have also been dropping your head in your stander more, as if it is really heavy and hard to keep upright. Normally, this isn't really an issue but lately it's been tiring for you. I also know you are gaining good strength so I try and challenge you to work through it.

I talked with Papa Don yesterday. He sent me the sweetest text about these letters I am writing for you. When I talked to him, he said it made him a little sad to read them. I don't want him to feel sad because I love my role as your mommy. Raising a child with special needs is so rewarding. I would like to think more rewarding than raising a typical child. However, because you are my only daughter, I really have no idea. All children make their parents proud, it is a different pride.When you do something, for instance, when you lift your head from the belly position, my heart beams with pride. I have watched you struggle to do this so when you hold your head high, I am more then impressed. Hard work is paying off. Most babies can do this with ease within a few months. They don't need to be trained through therapy. It just happens naturally for them. This is why I think raising you is even more rewarding. You always amaze me. So, next time we see Papa Don, maybe you can show him something new and amazing.

I hope you feel better when you wake up. We have a big week ahead. We are packed with all of your therapies and I am speaking on a parent panel at Perkins. I am pushing myself outside of my comfort zone and choosing to do this because I am very passionate about you and if I can help give any advice by sharing our story then I accept the challenge. Sweet dreams my love.

Love, Mommy